Soccer Girls

Saturday the girls played games. It was the 1st game for the big girls and the first time they played together on the field. I really enjoyed watching them out there together. They are both turning out to be very good players! Chloe was the superstar of the team, scoring 8 points by herself (no goalie in this league). She is just so fast. She is shortest, but the quickest, so don't let the Hughes girls' sizes fool you! I was so surprised to see how Chloe honestly "gets" how to play. Some of the others don't, so I guess that goes with being the little sister of 2 other soccer stars:-)

Abbi and Hannah's team lost...big time! Abbi has never lost a game and this is her 4th season of playing. It is a young team and some inexperience is out there. My girls knew their stuff, but a few others kind of didn't (oops!). The funny thing is by the time soccer season is over, they'll be getting better.

This is our first weekend/week back to "normal". I honestly don't even know if I'll ever feel normal again though. I can smile and laugh at my children and enjoy them, but there is an ache in my heart at the same time. I miss my Daddy more than I ever realized I would. I wish I could tell him that. There are many moments where I'm happy and sad together and these emotions don't make sense to me. I know we'll get there. I am sometimes sad, mad, numb, etc. I'm so confused on what to say or do sometimes. My poor Mama lost her husband and that saddens my heart.

Chloe asked me if she could name her special doggie she sleeps with "G-daddy". I told her that sounded nice and she said, "I didn't want you to be sad when you heard that name". My kids are worried about me and that is so sweet. They've seen a lot this week emotionally, but they are tough cookies on when they grow up, they'll understand more.

I went to church and got some really caring hugs and words. I also saw this past week how wonderful my husband is. Last year was a hard time for us, but was a cake walk compared to this valley I'm in. He sees me hurting and tries desperately to hold me, help me, and make things easier right now. He has held me as I sobbed and he has listened to me and helped me vent. He also has done piles of laundry and things around the house when I just didn't give a care this week. He was right there by my family's side and doing whatever needed to be done that we just didn't have time or energy for (making errands, going to town, burning trash, etc). I knew that after 23 years of knowing Jamie and 17 years of marriage that he was a good man, but this week has really shown me how much he truly loves me AND my family. It is amazing to have him by my side in life and I know this is hard on him too. He spoke at my Daddy's graveside service beautifully even if the words were hard to come at first. I appreciate my man in a whole new way.

God will help us muddle through this one way or another.